#21 There is your truth… and millions of others… (from) 49 Life Lessons it took me 50 years to learn
Our beliefs are not our own. Well, they are today but they were handed to us over time. By our parents, family, environment, culture, friends, community, spirituality and the list goes on. And then our experiences amplify them. We make story’s up about them which also helps cement them into our thoughts, minds, and psyche. They become … our truth.
So, if you have your truth (your beliefs embedded over time) and I have my truth (my beliefs embedded over time) and everyone around you has their truth (their beliefs embedded over time) my question to you… is which truth is true? Which truth is real? Which truth is right?
The answer is, they are all right, true and real!
Ok, strap yourself in…
My truth: I eat meat
A Vegan’s truth: They don’t
My truth: I love tattoos
My sister’s truth: She doesn’t
My truth: I love to be active, outdoors
My son’s truth: He relaxes by online gaming
My truth: I don’t smoke (anymore)
My Mum’s truth: She smoked (until the day she died)
My truth: I drink alcohol (occasionally)
My Mum’s truth: She didn’t drink alcohol (she was an alcoholic)
My truth: I am heterosexual
My friend’s truth: they are homosexual
I also have my truths around culture, politics, and religion. And a multitude of other things too.
And so does every other human in the world.
None of them are right and none of them are wrong.
But my truths are my truths. Not right, not wrong, just mine. Some people share some of them with me, and some people don’t. My truths have also changed over time by being open to new experiences and being open to other people’s truths. Spending the first half of 2016 in Saudi Arabia changed many of my truths. And I hope that my truths keep changing as I continue to live.
Now, for the most part, people’s little truths won’t ‘trigger’ us. If you only drink tea and I drink coffee, who cares? Right?
But it is indeed the big truths that we will ultimately step on a soap box about and defend in a ‘truth’ sword battle to the death.
I see it on Facebook all the time (and I am sure you do too). Someone shares their truth, then someone takes offense to that person’s truth, then attempts to put their own truth forward as the ‘real’ truth and on it goes…. backward and forwards until it usually ends up becoming personal. The facebook community grabs their popcorn and like a train wreck, we can’t stop watching. And all because two people (based on different beliefs) believe their truth is right.
But here’s the thing. We don’t have to agree but we don’t have to disagree either. We could just choose to accept there are millions of truths in the world. None of which are right and none of which are wrong. They are simply just not the same as our own. And that’s actually OK.
And if you have been reading these for a while or you are part of the conversation in the ‘What’s So Right – The Good News Project’ Facebook Group, you will know that I say this on repeat. These Life Lessons are a practice. A daily practice.
The first step is always simply to notice when something is triggering you. When you are in inside your head (ego) and outside of your heart (love).
What is right and true for someone else, may not be right and true for you. And that’s OK.
And what is right and true for you, may not be right and true for someone else. And that’s also, OK.
Respectful and healthy discussions can add value to the world.
Arguing over who’s truth is right or wrong is futile.
Ego = arguing and needing to be right.
Love = respecting the truths of the world, even when they differ from yours.